Finding Mr. Right

     If you read my last post, you know that I was a highly enthusiastic ballroom dancer for approximately 7 years.   These days, however, I rarely dance.  Strangely, I miss it to some degree but no at all to the extent you might expect.  If my husband enjoyed dancing, no doubt we would do it together.  But he doesn't.  We did a choreographed Waltz for our wedding dance and I promised him I wouldn't ask him to take up dancing beyond that.

    You might wonder, though, how we got together.  What did we have in common?  Did we each know what we were looking for and how important each of those traits was?  We did.  Strangely enough, we had separately attended the same class on "Relationship Needs/Wants/Desires," so we had actually sorted out our priorities.

    I knew that what mattered most to me were character traits - honesty, fidelity, the ability to give and take in equal measure, etc.  A hobby was a nice thing to share with a mate, but otherwise, pretty low on my priority list.  The ability to communicate clearly was essential.  In order to really listen
to what was being said and take it in fully, I needed to know that love was always the driving force.
My husband and I are able to discuss anything.  We are able to resolve any issues, I believe, because we both know our relationship is more important than any point we may diverge on.  Also, we don't diverge on the structural points of life (morality, life goals, etc).   When you're lucky enough to find someone who makes you want to be your best self (at least some of the time), someone who teaches you the meaning of love in their every day actions, you understand very clearly just how lucky you are.

     Henry and I married (both for the first time) in our late 40's.  We both agree, we would never have recognized each other at an earlier age.   We also have a theory (as this was the case with each of us) that once you finally determine you want and are ready for "the" relationship, you don't have to go out in search of the other person, they will simply fall into your lap!

     I've been with my husband for the last 10 years and they have been the happiest years of my life.
I would say that is true in spite of Parkinson's Disease.  But actually, having P.D. highlights even more just how much we mean to each other.